My grandma passed away on the week of G12 conference. All my family and relatives are pre-believers except for one distant cousin, who has not been going to church for four years. They planned a Taoist funeral for my grandma, so I was quite concerned if I would be made to go through any of those rituals. I spoke to my dad on the first day, and asked to be excused for the rituals. He told me to participate and he walked away without negotiation.
A tent was built to house an altar full of deities and idols for the procession on the final night. I felt very uncomfortable and do not want to compromise what I believe in. I decided to speak to ask my dad again, praying that he will soften his heart. However, he got angrier with me. In turn, I was also very upset.
To avoid facing my dad and relatives who are gossiping about me, I went for G12 conference on Friday. I know I will be comforted after meeting my cell group and leader. I managed to speak to Pastor Danny and my cell group, pouring out what I had kept for the past 3 days – persecution, gossip, pressure to compromise, etc. They prayed for me and I felt better after that. Though there was still fear in me to confront the situation when I returned home, I knelt and ask God to make a way for me. I was afraid that my father might chase me out of the funeral.
When I reached home, I asked my mother if I still must participant in the ritual. She said she will talk to my dad. Eventually, my dad agreed that I will not participate though he was still unhappy about it!
My relatives continued to gossip about me on this matter, this caused my mum to be heartbroken. Yet in my heart, I was fully secured in the Lord and was really feeling okay with what they said. They do not know what they are doing.
I believed this is not just a funeral that traditions and practices are enforced on unwilling daughter, but a lesson to teach me and make a stand. I learnt to stand up for my God and not to compromise when situation seems to be so difficult. If God is for me, who can be against me?
Romans 8:31 – “…If God is for us, who can be against us?”
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The thing that I brought home (literally, as you will see if you read on) from the conference was a greater impartation of faith. Not just for the multitudes but also for what He can do for my family.
My maid and my mother have a rather disharmonious relationship. Basically their communication consists largely of my mom screaming at her for screwing up and my maid trying hard to understand where she went wrong because of her poor grasp of the English language and my mother’s apparent “accent” (in my maid’s own words). As spectators to this bloody sport, my sis and I will try to stop my mom from going too far, but this usually produces the opposite result, unfortunately.
There were also times when my mom contemplated sending her back. When this happens, I usually get an sms from her telling me such. Coincidentally, it ALWAYS happens when I’m in church and it will ALWAYS be followed by an SMS by my sister telling me how scared she is and how lonely she will be when the maid leaves. This will ALWAYS leave me feeling horrendously guilty for not being there for my family.
Keeping to that rather morbid pattern, I received several smses from my mom and sis regarding the abovementioned topic during the G12 conference. This time it seemed final. My maid was actually packing her bags at that very same time. I felt very discouraged. It felt like the Hiroshima end days of my nuclear family. The subsequent SMS exchange I had with my sister was nothing short of depressing as she shared about what transpired and how she felt about it (she cried).
I was all ready to cave in to the belief that in real life things never change, when I remembered one of the pastors saying something like “you can never please God without faith” and thus one should believe. It was then that I made a desperate prayer to the lord to resolve my little domestic situation. I cannot remember the exact words I uttered but it was something to the effect of asking God to preserve the sanctity of the familial institution.
What happened next was nothing short of amazing.
The next SMS I received was from my mom telling me that she was keeping my maid.
She added that she talked to my maid and they HUGGED (I expected an exchange of blows actually) and my maid told my mom that my mom was just like a mother to her.
That left me speechless.
It is not one-off too, what happened with my family. I can sense my mother making an effort to be more patient with my maid. She fails sometimes, but it’s a work in progress and I’m thankful.
To shamelessly rip off a certain sportswear label, impossible is nothing to God.
So today, make the choice to hope and believe.
There can be change.
If you make that change to keep the faith regardless, everything will change.
Krystle
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'When you change, everything can change.'
This is something a lot of people caught during the G12 conference and it has never been more real to me.
I am a first generation Christian in my family and it is often difficult to stand strong because of the many persecutions I face at home. My whole family believes in Buddhism. As if the generation gap between my parents and I was not bad enough, the difference in faith made it worse altogether. All along they cannot accept the fact that I have already converted and deep in their hearts, they cling onto a hope similar to mine- that is to convert the other party to the same faith. This is very evident in my home.
A huge wooden Buddha statue was placed in my not-very-big room, on it hung numerous pendants of idols. From the start, I knew better than to voice out my negative feelings towards the arrangement because my parents are very authoritative- being the traditional Chinese family. So I kept telling myself that “it is okay” but deep down in my heart I know this has shook my faith. It was just disturbing having to wake up seeing the statue and going to bed facing it too. What can I do but to pray?
During the Delirious? worship concert, everyone went forward to worship including me. The music was super loud, and I found myself soaked in the whole atmosphere. But God brought my mind back the situation at home; I started crying out to God. Taking advantage of the loud worship and music, it gave me courage to shout onto the Lord and ask Him to come and change things at home because I am so sick and tired of the constant. I told God I will not stop shouting unless He come and do something, anything in my home. Indeed, God did something.
After the end of conference, I received a message from my mum. It read 'When are you coming back? I've got a surprise for you in your room.' At first, it did not really appeal to me, in fact I started to reflect if I have done anything wrong, like “my phone-bill went out of hand again" or "I left my room in a mess this morning?". When I reached home, I immediately went to my table to look for any phone bill.
Surprisingly, there was none. It took me a few minutes to realize that my room was rearranged. And the big wooden buddha statue was removed! It was removed without involving any fights or quarrels, but by mere grace, prayer and faith. I was so shocked and pleasantly surprised for I know this surprise came not from my mum, but from God. He answered my prayer! I did not shout in vain! I praise the Lord for everything He has done, from the bottom of my heart and I am sure He is doing something in each and every person's life, its only whether we want to let God or limit God. Do not ever decide for God by limiting your faith or ceasing in prayer because He is the Almighty King!
Paulina
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After going through so many days of listening to the Holy spirit, and hearing from many anointed men/women of God speaking, we've come to the last day of G12 conference. whereby Pastor Cesar preached about living in God's divine purpose. And one sentence that he made on that sunday really spoke to me. He said that whatever God has for us, we cannot see it through our naked eyes.
And that really spoke to me. Many times, when we choose to look at God's divine purposes and plans for us using our naked eyes, we will tend to ask God why is it this way and why can't it be that way. But when we choose to look at it from God's perspective, our spiritual eyes, God's words, we will know that God has a plan/purpose to prosper us and not to harm us. A plan to give us a hope and a future.
I really asked myself, questioned God, asked my friends, even grumbled to my schoolmates about the fact that I did not manage to get a CapitaLand scholarship. The background is this, about September last year, CapitaLand shortlisted some of us from my course and I am also part of the team.
At that point of time, i really thank God for this divine chance to ease my family burden. And I really prayed hard for it. But the moment i knew that i did not get that scholarship, my heart sank. I start to question God why gave me this chance and yet take it away?
But after last sunday's sermon, as i was reflecting upon it (Yes, i still think about it some time) I realized that i was looking at a very superficial level of that opportunity. I neglected the experience I've gained from that interview (in front of a panel of 'jugdes')
Today, i just came back from my second interview for my internship program. And i dare to say that i believe i did better this time and with so much confident as compare to last time. Continue to pray together with me because i believe God is using me in a deeper measure.
Praise the Lord!
Chuanlian
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